College, Nostalgia, Growing Up

It's been almost 2 years since the start of Self-Lovin' Hearts. Going from an incoming junior in high school to an incoming freshman in college. It's also been almost 2 years since I wrote my last blog post! A lot has happened since then:

1. SLH has grown from one county to 11 states and 2 countries outside the U.S. (we became international)

2. I dyed my hair

3. I got my driver's license

4. Tried lash extensions for the first time

5. Graduated high school!

There's a lot more, but there's one most important thing that happened over that time span: I stopped comparing myself to other people academically. Ever since the tragic living nightmare disguised as Ivy Day, where I received all rejections, I realized that my happiness had become too dependent on college admissions. Becoming content with myself and my own journey has been the true root of my happiness, and I knew that I never wanted to lose myself again.

With that said, I have always been a nostalgic person. Although I lost my sense of identity at one point, I don't think I've ever not been nostalgic. Going into my last summer as a kid, nostalgia hit much harder than it usually does.

For example, I've been involved in my high school's choir program for all of my 4 years at high school and joined the advanced group (chamber choir), during my senior year. The day after graduation, I remember sitting in bed listening to a Voice Memo that I recorded on my phone of our chamber choir's recording of "The Christmas Song", one of my favorite holiday songs that we never got to perform during our winter gigs. I would have given anything to go back.

Or when How Much I Feel by Ambrosia comes on shuffle on my Spotify, I'm suddenly transported back to when my sister and I would come back from the Disney Store with Cinnabon ready to eat on the car ride back home from the mall. My parents always played the same 70s songs, mainly Bread (which is why I've grown to love that genre of music).

For all the times I've scrolled on my photo gallery and wish I could go back to those moments, I think about how lucky I am to have experienced such special memories with the people in my life and that I am able to look back and wish to experience them again. To me, it means I've been living a life worth living.